Leaning towards Joy

This is my mission these days. To do things that bring me joy. Not to focus on the negative aspects, but to the positive. Let me explain a bit.

After the intense years of inner work I can say, that I am becoming more and more free. I don't know anything about the future, but I don't think about it that much. These days I don't get irriteded as I used to did. I am okey with everything in my life no matter what it is in that moment. There are things that I can control, like my actions and the records playing in my head. But life, no way! It happens just the way it wants. I can not push things or make them happen any faster. I can choose to be impatient or I can relax and enjoy. I choose to relax and I also allow myself to get bored. Not always easy, but I am getting quite good at it. And I can choose to be happy. I actually can choose it! Right here and now.

I was just in Berlin for a couple of days and I was so enjoying the feeling of freedom there. This is a city with a history of wars, violance and injustice for human rights. The city is full of monuments for victories and freedom. As I was sitting in the east side of Berlin, in a terrace by the river, with the sun shining to my face I realised, that I actually love life. I am so honored to be here and experience all that I am experiencing. That I am very much alive and just in peace with everything. I don't have to try to change anything anymore or anyone for that matter. I don't see people weak anymore and I don't feel sorry for anyone, but instaid I see the great creating power that we all have. We all just have forgotten the fact that the keys to change what ever is not serving us, are in our own hands!

So my focus these days is joy. We all know that shity things are happening in the world and it is not that I want to put my head in the sand and not to see what is going around me. I am very aware about everything. But sitting there in the terrace, I understood, that in order for me to change things, it is all about me. The change starts with me. So instaid of focusing on what is wrong in the world, I want to focus on how beatiful life is! What is good in our planet and in my life.

What if, just what if, you would start to see things differently? What would happen if you started to see beauty around you instaid of complaining of how bad things are? Just think if everybody in this planet would do so, would there be wars?! Would a happy man shoot someone, his brother or sister? Would he beat up his wife with fist or with words?! Or her husband?! Would a happy person be mean to his/her kids?! Would a happy man see black or white or yellow skin colour?! What about focusing what you already have instaid of what you don't have?

This is why our inner world plays such a big part in everything. I only start to even understand it myself. It is huge! Anything that is going on inside of us, for sure, is reflected outside!

So. This is why my focus now is in joy. This is my contribution to the world peace. Having peace within me, means I am in peace and harmony with everything around me. I allow this car to drive slowly, it can not spoil my day. I allow the que in the shop be long and take time, since I choose not to let it spoil my day.

My joy is small things and sometimes big things. It is waking up everyday. That is a blessing, because it means that anything can happen. It is long walks, it is meeting new people and places. It is watching a good movie, it is time spend with my family and friends. Or by myself. It is about enjoying the sun in my face in Berlin.

And the wierd thing is that when I start to change my thoughts about the people and the world, I get "what I order". I meet nice, beautiful people. I meet open, friendly and again beautiful people. I see beutiful places and surroundings everywhere. I see beauty, period.

And again I thank myself for doing my inner work because without that this could not be possible. I used to judge, critisize and blamed people for my misery. And I got "what I orded". Thank god for my courage to go through this inner clensing! Even though it was very very tough and I had to let go of many people and things, I now understand fully why it was so important. This feeling that is inside of me at the moment...... well, I can not put it in words. It is so amazing! I could have never ever, in million years, imagine feeling like this. It is this unconditional love that I have for all beings. Not seeing ugly people anymore, but uniquenes.

And so I keep on focusing on joy. And it keeps coming back to me again and again in other peoples faces, in their smiles and greetings. It keeps coming to me with a sun rise and with the flowers that are pushing their way out from the still frozen ground. And from the dephts of my heart I can say, that I love being me and I truly love my life! I chose to be the change I want to see in this world. What could be bigger thing then that!

"Im starting with the man in the mirrow. Im asking him to change his ways. If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make the change."
- Michael Jackson -